PULL ME UNDER - Fear Of The Dark - Twenty-One

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Twenty-One

Irynna, in her lovely, clinging leather breeches as a barrier from assault, straddled Tanner while scornfully changing the bandage at his shoulder, tongue in her teeth as she concentrated.

“How’s it looking, Doc?”

“Disgusting. No woman is ever going to want you with scars like this.”

“I disagree. I find women admire scars. This one on my jaw,” he pointed, “has net me more pussy with it than without it, I promise. You included.”

“Oh, I love a humble man.” He missed that scorn more than he cared to admit.

“I’m the humblest.”

“I don’t know why we didn’t let that demon drag you away.”

He laughed. “Ah, you must like having me around.”

“Lauren feels the need to keep you alive, being blood and all. Myself, I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it.”

“Not even a wink?” She was wonderful.

“Not one,” she said, looking down at him with a genuine desire to see him mauled, a slight flinch to feel how he was pressing up against her, he couldn’t help himself, it was completely involuntary. “I didn’t think you had enough blood left for that nonsense.”

“You know, where I come from, most women wear pants. So, don’t think your outfit is in any way, shape, or form a challenge for me.” His grin hurt his cheek. She rocked her hips just enough, his heart fluttering expectantly, and then pressed her finger down into the fresh bandage at his shoulder, hard and with a twist, which earned a shrieked “fuck!” out of Tanner—he punched his fist down on the bedding, face going red with pain and she kept pressing, a curl of a snarl at the side of her nose, until he finally grabbed at the nape of her neck and brought her down to him, violently kissing her and she tasted like heaven. It worked, she stopped pushing on the wound, and better still, she reciprocated the kiss for a long while, but only a kiss, enough to make him frown when she pulled away. She knew she had the upper hand for his weakened state, and got off him to fetch the food waiting for him near the fire, kept warm while she nursed him. “You sure you aren’t a witch?”

“Very sure. Eat up. Lauren wants to go out hunting with me again, she loves my birds. You should come too, if you can ride.”

“I can ride you,” he proposed, but she ignored him. “Should Lauren be riding?”

“Why not? If it were dangerous for a mother to ride there wouldn’t be a single living Dvarri.”

He took the hot stew from her and sat up with a wince, a slight waver in his head, no blood in his brain for multiple reasons. Noting the lack of decent meat, he mixed the food around in the bowl to cool it. Most of everything was being syphoned off to Kaddusk, he surmised.

“Don’t worry, she gets enough.” Irynna must have been watching him. “We take good care of our women when they’re with child. Mothers make warriors.”

“How’s Ddun?” Since he hadn’t left the medicine tent yet to talk to anyone, not having the strength, he had some worry. Lauren wasn’t crying to him, but he wanted to make sure.

“Oh, it’s terrible. He’s constantly doting on her and practically carries her around everywhere. If you did that to me, I’d vomit.”

He smirked at her again, the thought of knocking up the psychotic bitch gave him no better thrill. Imagining how angry she would get. It was extremely tempting. God, he missed being around women. “So when are we going hunting?”

She finally softened to him, and he admired the little dimple at her chin, her strong jawline, her narrow eyes that seemed to glow whenever she was caught looking at him. His stomach knotted, expecting arrows through the felt as punishment for admiring her. He would need more than another fingerbone necklace, if that happened. He ate the stew, ignoring the sting in his cheek, trying to put out of his head the images of her blood down his front.

***

The horizon was vast and sparse. The flatness occasionally disturbed by the subtle rolls of earth and stone. Swirls of snow in coils on the ground, shifting as the wind blew. The dry evidence of summer flowers long having spread their seeds to crop up again in the spring. Blue above them, no clouds, a boastful winter sun. Tanner felt like he was intruding on something, to be out there, some secret.

“You don’t believe me? Why would I lie about it. I swear, I didn’t find you. You found us.” Lauren spoke in a hissed whisper, keeping her voice low as to not scare away any potential game, though they were never told to whisper.

Tanner shifted his eyes from the horizon, to Irynna’s back, her huge falcon with its tiny little hat perched on her arm. He matched Lauren’s volume. “It’s not that I don’t believe you, it’s just that it’s not possible. I’m not the one with magic. Meired said so. Her magic found you, not me.”

“Well, maybe she’s wrong.” Lauren huffed. Her cheeks were a little plumper, it was endearing. The sun might be radiating from her, the disk above a hoax. He never really thought of his sister as a woman, a stupid thing, she was his sister, they were both kids still, weren’t they? Not really. There she was, proof time was advancing and he had no control over it. “Only thing is, she can sense them, the portals I mean. She feels it like a ripple on her skin, I remember her saying so. That’s why I don’t use it, it’s impossible that I triggered it. I’m sure that you coming here drew her attention. I hope I’m wrong. Ddun and I are going back to Kaddusk where it’s safer while I’m still, well, small-ish. Now that you’re better, you should too.”

Irynna took the little cap off the falcon, exposing the intelligent black eyes that caught every motion, searching for the kill. With a toss of her arm and a “ho, Yol!” the bird was off, bells on a long leather string tied to the legs softly ringing at the flight, and everyone’s eyes followed it. Tanner watched it with envy, admiring the dark beauty of its feathers, its wings silhouetted on the sky curving effortlessly in the wind. “Hare,” Irynna pointed. “Watch what a good boy Yol is.”

There was a chase, the hare scrambling so far in the distance, camouflaged to the snow and pale dead grass, if it weren’t for the motions of the falcon Tanner would have to take her word for it being there. Then the bird slammed down on its prey, and Irynna was off like a shot. He whistled at her speed. Going to her bird to dispatch the hare, he watched it all with awe, both creatures—human and falcon—so beautiful and fearless. He felt like a real nomad, the wildness of the scene filling his chest with heat, like a sort of pride, though he didn’t know what he was prideful for.

They caught two hares before Tanner had to head back, not able to keep out the chill, and having a hard time staying upright.

***

“We need to get into that room.” Ddun pulled meat from the bone to punctuate his words. They all ate crowded in the medicine tent to let Tanner relax on his bedding. Grandmother came in and out to fetch herbs, a couple children in the camp had come down with a fever. It felt like a normal winter. But it wasn’t, not as Tanner and Lauren both sat with him, with that strange haze in his periphery. “We need to see what’s on those scrolls. Tanner, that’s the first thing you’re doing when we get back.”

“Me? I thought you’ve already had someone try to pop the lock.”

“Rudda tried when he was getting the castle ready before the moot. I figure you’d be the better one to ask, now that we know Meired has been busy. I can’t trust just anyone with that room.”

Tanner bobbed his head. “Sure, I’ll figure it out. Why the fuck not.”

“I’ll help you,” Lauren said, and this earned a concerned, befuddled look from both men. “What?”

“You aren’t afraid to go to the castle?” Tanner asked.

“Why should she be afraid?” Irynna tossed her hair out of her face before taking a mouthful of meat. “It’s just a big ugly house.”

“Long story,” Tanner and Lauren answered in unison. Ddun chewed the meat slowly, wondering how this girl didn’t know the story by now. That was the whole reason for the eagle’s head on the banner. Everyone knew of the beast they slew. Was she an idiot? An idiot who happened to be a good huntress, an idiot savant, communicating with animals came easy but humans were outside her depths. Lauren did tend to befriend the unfortunate.

“Long story, huh! The witch isn’t at the castle anymore. She’s in Kisku. Why don’t we just skip the middle, and go there.”

Ddun tossed the bone down to the plate with a snap. “Because I need to return to my men, first.”

“Didn’t stop you from running away to begin with.” She cocked her head as she spoke to dare a retort. When she received nothing but a glare from him, she continued. “I suppose I could say hello to my brothers.”

“Your brothers?” Tanner asked, a slight cough.

“I have six brothers. I’m the seventh, and the only daughter. I suppose that makes me lucky.”

“That makes your mother lucky,” Ddun corrected her.

“My mother is dead, and that’s very unlucky. I’m lucky because I’m not the one going to war for you. One last chance for my clan to continue on,” she spoke with a theatrical solemn declaration, and he wondered if Tanner really did get hit on the head one too many times the way he was looking at her.

Lauren moaned, putting a hand to her forehead. “Please, I don’t want to think about that. I’m having a hard enough time thinking about the castle.”

Ddun found his face was becoming increasingly red the longer they spoke, the heat increased like a stoked fire. “Your clan’s name will be noted and you will be fairly compensated.”

“Oh, I bet that’s what you tell all the girls, they must lay with you in droves at the words. I bet they swoon at the thought as they watch their menfolk ride off, singing to themselves ‘I will be fairly compensated.’”

“Irynna!” Lauren hissed the name, and only then did Ddun stop himself from hitting the idiot woman. “Neither of you are helping.”

“It’s helping me,” Tanner said with his stupid grin, his hands behind his head as if he were the most relaxed he could ever be, “they say laughter is the best medicine and she’s goddamn hilarious. Your head looks like a stubbed toe. Take a breath, man.”

He refused. He wanted to beat Tanner over the head, but took pity on him due to his injuries—including the strangling. Ddun turned his ire back to Irynna. “We are always at war. This one is just bigger. Your brothers are warriors, as I am, as Tanner is. Death is a constant. Your brothers know this. How many rival clans have your brothers raided?”

“Do you think that makes it alright for us women?” She was cold serious, her eyes pinning him in his place. He had no rebuttal. The issues of women weren’t high on his list of concerns these days, if ever. Except Lauren. No, even Lauren had been a secondary thought these past months, he was ashamed to admit, knowing what he knows now… So he did as Tanner suggested, took a deep breath, and returned to his meal, hesitating before taking the next piece. Suddenly, the thought of death was a sharp one, a less glorified one, to think he might not see the child grow. A strange feeling, more than fright, deeper than that. He wasn’t hungry anymore. Lauren ate his share.

He still needed to return to his responsibility (Rudda is surely ready to kill me for running off) and do what needed to be done, and that was a man’s sacrifice. He watched Lauren eat, and wished desperately he didn’t have to take her anywhere, to stay right there, like in summer, but that was done.

He said as much to her in the evening as they lay together, his head at her chest and hand on her belly, watching her breasts rise and fall with her breaths. She combed her fingers through his hair with a wistful sigh. “We’ve known each other such a short time,” she said. “Yet here we are, I’m having your baby, and the reality is, that even if I hadn’t met you, if your clan never picked us up in the forest, I’d still be here, forever, only without you. A baby. I never thought I’d ever have a baby.” Her voice cracked as if she might cry, but she simply breathed, continuing to tickle his head, his ear, squeezing his hand at her belly, tiny gestures that he was treasuring as if they were the finest gold. Then she laughed, with a sniff. “It’s more frightening than the thought of dying, isn’t it?”

He had to agree. Though he had long apologized for his reaction when he first saw her swell beneath her blouse, that was the real reason for his reaction. He was terrified, and angry with himself for having done that to her. Mostly terrified. Somehow, the thought of killing a man was easier on him than the thought of raising one. “I hope its a girl,” he said, “boys are nothing but trouble.”

“Thinking of yourself there, chief?”

“Well, am I wrong?”

“No. But I’d still like a boy. Girls are nothing but trouble. Trust me,” she laughed, the baby bouncing with it. “Where I come from, we’d know by now. They can beam soundwaves into me, and you can see the image of it in there, its face and fingers, and they can tell you if it’s healthy, no deformities or anything, and if it’s a boy or a girl. More reliable than a Grandmother’s hunch.”

He couldn’t even fathom the world she came from. No wonder she had magic in her. “What is Grandmother’s hunch?” That was something he knew, and trusted.

“Boy.”

“When?”

“Just past the solstice.”

“I won’t leave the north until then.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, we both know that’s not possible, Ddun.”

He went up on his elbow, looked down at her, remembering a promise he had simply joked with himself to commit to so long ago. “Alright then. I’ll promise something else. I’ll make you my wife.”

“Ah, I know how it is with you Dvarri savages. You’ll have six or seven by the time we’re old, and they’ll all be younger and younger the older I get.”

“And lots of concubines, if I’m lucky.”

“Ha! No wonder Tanner loves it here. No shame at all in having hordes of illegitimate children running around. How cute of you to offer, to make it right for me.” She smiled at him, eyes bright with levity, her fingers twiddling while she waited for something from him, some joke or kiss or anything at all, but he could only admire her, and wonder what other secrets she kept behind those eyes. “Well, I suppose I don’t have much else to do with my life around here. Sure. I’ll marry you. I’ll tell you something else about my world, too. If you put this bun in my oven and didn’t marry me, my father would shoot you.”

“Is that where Tanner gets his protectiveness for you?”

“I hope not. My dad is an asshole. Sometimes I wonder if he’s worried about us at all. Then I hope he’s worried himself to death.”

He missed his own father very much. He was a strong man, a good man, died honourably. “What about your mother?”

“My mother—my mother was very distracted, and I doubt she misses us either. The night when Meired nabbed me? I was angry because Tanner was right.”

He remembered that night more clearly than he should. “Who was Duke?”

She stopped fidgeting then, her eyes darting, as if following a bug flying around the tent. “He was my boyfriend. Does that upset you?”

“You mean that you weren’t a virgin? I could tell you weren’t, and it makes no difference to me.”

She snorted a laugh. “You’re not as dumb as you look, then. He treated me… rather poorly.”

His head burned with hatred for a man that didn’t exist, and Orman’s bloated face appeared in his mind. “And you didn’t kill him?”

“Murder is frowned upon in my culture, unfortunately. Though, yes, I did try.”

“I’d expect no less of you.” He calmed. “Why would you want to return if there was no one who cared for you?”

She laughed again, and he couldn’t help but smile with her. “I did have friends, believe it or not. And in this world everyone is running around half naked killing each other! Actually killing each other, left and right! You’ve made killers of me and Tanner! It is kind of upsetting.”

“If we discovered how to get you home, would you go?”

She thought only a moment on it. “Nope. I’ve gotten over it. I’m still scared though.”

He was, too. He kissed her then, to hide his eyes from her, not wanting to break the illusion he projected for her that nothing frightened Ddun.